Post Thanksgiving Funk

Last week I was fortunate enough to have the opportunity to visit my training host family and Malang and to enjoy a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner at Consulate General Kristen Bower's home. The weekend was lovely. I was thankful for my Malang host family (and their love for my single serving apple pies) and all the PCV friends that I got to feast with. All in all not a bad Thanksgiving weekend.

 

As the weekend drew to a close, however, I found myself reluctant to return to site. I was sorely temped to stay another night, but the cost associated with such a decision did bring me to my senses. So with a pessimistic attitude I boarded the bus Sunday afternoon. Since arriving back home I have found myself in a lethargic state. I am calling it my Post Thanksgiving Funk.

 

Throughout my service so far, I have found myself happy almost all of the time. Sure there was initial adjustment to site and the homesickness than followed, but at no time have I actually found myself reluctant to do much of anything fore more than a day or two at a time. I think that this prolonged funk can be attributed to the holiday season and the real lack of festivity surrounding me. Sure I have been watching Christmas movies and listening to Christmas music, but it feels out of place. My subconscious still thinks it is June and it isn't even ready for Christmas in  July.

 

This mood has effected my motivation do things. This week I have found myself lesson planning while half sleeping in the mornings and reluctant to do anything social after school. Fortunately my lesson plans have worked out pretty well, but this is only because we are in our final weeks of classes and we have begun reviewing for the final. I am therefore not teaching much of anything at the moment. I have also been able to get myself out for volleyball, which is good. At least I am not held up in my bedroom for those two hours.

 

Because of a mixture of moodiness and my journey to Malang and Surabaya, my 30 day challenge has only had a good start. I got myself out of the house on only one occasion so far. I will need to remedy this in the remaining 2.5 weeks. Hopefully I will be able to shake the funk and really be in the moment here before Christmas.

 

The good news is that I have not handled this bout of homesickness the way I had previously. Before I 

would take any sign of sickness and secretly hope that it would enough to get me medivaced (sent back to DC) for just a couple of weeks. PC policy is that if you return to full health within 40 days of being in DC then you are allowed to return to site. It is pretty ridiculous that that was a regular day dream for about two or three months, but you do what you can to survive.

 

Now I just see myself muddling through the funk here, where my home is now and will be fore the next year and a half. I have no desire to leave, I just want to have a Christmas that feels like Christmas. There is no need to worry though. In just 2.5 weeks I will be off to the Philippines and although it is still hot there, it is filled with family. I can't think of anything better to throw off the funk, although I do hope that I can shake it before I get there. I hope everyone is enjoying their holiday season. Have a peppermint mocha for me from Starbucks (they cost as much as a Pizza Hut pizza here!). I will continue to watch Christmas movies, listen to music, and maybe I will find my way out of the fog in another day or two.

The 30 day Community Challenge

Exactly one month from today I will be leaving my community for a couple of weeks and I will head off to the Philippines to spend my holidays with my family. By that time I will have surpassed the six month mark at site by three days and a quarter of my service at site will be gone; only 3/4 left. As I indicated yesterday, overall  I am very happy with my progress here at site, but the one area I still feel needs improvement.

Community integration has been a difficult area for me. I am hesitant to stop and talk to people (usually because I am whizzing by them on a bike), and therefore people know that I am here, but they don't know why. I have also been dreadful with names because I was always embarrassed the second or third time I met a person to ask them their name again and how can you say that you know someone if you can't even remember their name? In general I have let my fear of what others are thinking (although they will think it anyway), my novice grasp of the language, and my desire to not attract too much attention get the better of me. Although I am happy with my progress overall, it is time to shed my fears and just go for it.

In an attempt to face my final integration frontier head on I have devised a 30 day challenge for myself. Recently I have seen several people participating in various 30 day challenges and I feel that it is time for me to get my own on. As I stated before I am in my fifth month at site. Although adaption is an ongoing process and I know that I will still encounter unfamiliar situations long after six months, the quarter mark at service is a decent benchmark for familiarizing and observing to lessen and for action to start. I want to make sure that I have done all I can before I hit this mark, so I am committing to get out into the community more over the next month.

For this challenge I have identified three days a week which currently lack scheduled plans during a chunk of the day; Sunday, Tuesday, and Friday. On these days I am committing to taking a walk (not a bike ride) and stopping in at anyone's house who invites me in. I will also commit to keeping a journal of all of my encounters so that I can better remember the people I speak with. On top of that, I expect that this challenge will give me some blogging material. Its time start relationships!

Today was a great kick off to this challenge. I went to the home of a church member who has been asking me to come by for a couple of months and I also stopped by a small house compound of sorts where three sisters live. Both excursions were long overdo, but they were a good way to get my feet wet. These were people I was familiar with and who had asked me to stop by on previous occasions. To my surprise the conversations flowed fairly effortlessly. I tried to do a better job of explaining why I was here, I answered some questions, and then I asked a few questions of my own. All in all a very successful day 1.

So here is getting out more and have no PC regrets about community integration!

Photo of the Day

My niece, Putri, and nephew, Akbar, blowing bubbles.

Trajectory

Somehow it is already mid/ the end of November, and I don't really know where the time went. In the last month a couple big PC things took place. During the last two weeks of October I traveled to Surabaya for our In Service Training (IST) and just this past week I had my site visit with a Peace Corps staff person. Although there are still more to come, it does seem like a majority of the major PC benchmarks have passed us by. A lot of this has to do with the fact that the office is much more hands on with you during the beginning of your service, but still time is flying by.

There isn't a whole lot of specifics to report on IST. I had a great time living in a hotel for two weeks with 26 other great American friends. It gave me the opportunity to get to know some of the volunteers that I  wasn't close to during PST (literally because of distance) and we were able to enjoy the comforts of western living for a bit. Its not like we are living in mud huts or without running water, but my house does lack a hot shower, sitting toilet, and actually something as basic as a sink. Movie theaters, malls, and Italian food are also a very nice treat.

Contrary to my host family's belief though, this was no vacation. We spent hours a day sitting in a conference room talking about our experience sand absorbing new information. Information, which I am pleased to report, that has been very helpful since returning to site. All in all, good times!

I think that the best  benefit of IST had little to do with being in Surabaya though. In fact the biggest benefit was just being away from site. Sometimes you need to be missed for you and others to understand the changes that have been taking place. Being away for two weeks was a significant amount of time and one of three things happened during that time.

1. Its true what they say, when you are too close to something it is hard to see the changes. You don't always notice when a friend looses weight if you are around them everyday, but the second you look at an old picture it is all too obvious. Maybe my students were slowly opening up to me and gaining confidence in my teaching style and I just wasn't able to see it until I stepped away for two weeks.
    
2. While I was gone my students recognized the difference between my teaching style and the way other teachers teach. They realized that I am trying to make their learning experiences more interactive and that they are actually learning something during the silly games and songs.

3. It was a combination of 1 & 2 (the most likely explanation).

All I know is that since I  have returned to school, my students have been more engaged in their classroom activities than they had been before. They are now following directions within a minute of me giving them instead of staring at me, and now they are asking more questions and looking for approval. It is great!

So just a few days ago I had my first site visit. After the first one they aren't too scheduled, but they usually occur when someone from DC is visiting, when someone form Jakarta is visiting, or when an event is happening at the school. This first one though was just a check in. Aside from occationally getting overwhelmed with the number of things that people want me to do (usually teaching English) everything at my site has been going swimmingly.

My relationships with my CPs has steadily been growing stronger and we are even embarking on a major project to write our own English workbooks for next semester. We are getting better at lesson planning together and we have finally started English department meetings. Clear goals have been set for the remaining part of this semester, and it looks like we should be able to start off strong next semester.

Life in the community has also been going well. I continue to love everyday that passes with my large host family (8 adults in one four bedroom house). I have also joined a women's volleyball club team, so I get a more competitive (not college level, but not jv either) practice in twice a week. Its just good time for me to chill with some women and girls in the community.

I do recognize, however, that my forays into the community have been pretty limited. I am not great at using my free time to get out of the house and meet people. I hesitate oh too often because it is probably one of the hardest parts of the job. We are constantly being watched and called out at and to put myself out there and meet people in the community usually means times filled with awkward conversations and a pretty strong language barrier. This is something I need to get over though. Integrating myself into the community was my number one goal in becoming a PCV and so far I have avoided it like it is the plague. Once I make first contact things will be fine, but I just need to get up my courage and do it.

At seven months in country though, I am happy with my progress and my trajectory. Hopefully I'll stay on course and just gather more power along the way.

The "Super Person" and the Indonesian School

In my last post I provided this link to an article in the New York Times. I don't know how much attention this article got back in the states, but judging from a couple of Facebook posts I saw, it wasn't unpopular. If you haven't read the article, it talks about "the new Super People." James Atlas compares the standards for top tier college students of his day to those of today and finds the gap to be astounding. The level of excellence expected of those students vying for a spot at topped ranked colleges is far greater than what was once required. He notes that "[his] contemporaries love to talk about how they would have been turned down by the schools they attended if they were applying today." Although Atlas continues on to question the validity the resumes' of "super people," what I am most interested in is the "super person" mindset and how it effects my work here.

As I read this I recognized that so much of what I accepted as normal as an adolescent and even as a college student is part of this "super person" mindset. If I were to compare my adolescence to Atlas' description, I would have to proclaimed myself a "super person." In high school my friends and I found ourselves taking as many high level courses as possible. As a three season athlete, a board member of at least two clubs, and a member of an acapella group, I could be found somewhere on the school grounds until at least 5:30 on a daily basis. During my summers I volunteered at an outdoor Shakespeare festival, worked at the local Build-A-Bear while studying for the SATs, and went to China to help with a summer English program. I may not have achieved the grades expected of "super person," but I ran with the crowd and had the mindset to boot. The funny thing is that I never thought twice about it. Sure there were a few times as a high school student that I recognized that it was probably not the best situation for my mental health, but everyone was doing it. It was normal.

 In some ways I loved the mindset and in other ways I despised it. The expectations my parents had of me became the expectations I had of myself by the time I reached high school. Being a "super person" allowed me many life experiences (some which my parents paid for and many which I worked for on my own) that I would not exchange. Please note that the name Atlas has given to people like me is ironic because being a "super person" can have some very adverse effects. I believe that this lifestyle brought me to some very emotional lows more times than I would have liked. As a "super person" you don't lead the most balanced lifestyle. It is "go Go GO" all the time and in the end it is emotionally exhausting.

As a teacher I often find myself thinking back to  my high school experience. Sometimes it is to use my former teachers as mentors (I had a lot of great ones), other times I try an remember what I was thinking as I sat on the receiving end, and a lot of the time I simply reminisce. When you compare my high school experience to that of my Indonesian students it is like the article, but in reverse. Some students study and work hard to be top students, but even with my ban on copied homework, I am fairly certain that a majority of them still get their answers from their friends (I can always tell who worked together). Most students just run home and sit around or hang out with friends without opening a notebook the rest of the day. Some come to sports or band practices afterschool, but as I mentioned in my volleyball post, team practice here is wildly different than what you see in America. In short I am a "super person" in a non-"super person" environment. Recall what I said yesterday, if I use the expectations I grew up with to measure my students, I would get frustrated very quickly.

During August I gave a lot of thought to the question, "Do I want to work to transform this into the high school I knew?" Every single time I thought "no" almost immediately. Why? Well because PCVs aren't sent around the world to turn their countries into little Americas. My goal here isn't to take what I know "works" in the US and try to put it in place here. For centuries people have discovered time and time again that that doesn't work. In addition, who is to say that it is the best situation. Just because people aren't dying doesn't mean that they are thriving on the most basic emotional levels.

It is important to recognize the positives and negatives of both situations. In Indonesia students are more carefree and able to be young. They have a strong sense of community and feel that the success of the class is important. On the other hand the students measure success by whether a test is passed and not by how much the comprehend. Students don't use critical thinking skills and rely on the smart students to get through test situations. Students from my high school experience had a strong background in a variety of subjects and hobbies. Considering their age they had a strong world view, and an appreciation for hard work. On the other hand they were very competitive and stressed out. Their competitive nature did not always nurture the strongest friendships and although no one admitted it, they often felt alone. Both sides have very negative effects.

Although, I don't want the Indonesia I know to turn into a mini America, I do feel that education does need to be taken more seriously. How do we find balance? I am not sure that a perfect equilibrium will every be struck, but there must be a way for Indonesian students to see the value in education without going to the extreme of needing to become a "super person." At the same time, the youth of America should not have to be a "super person" just to have a sense of self worth. Somehow I must merge my past with my present and hope that in the end my students benefit from it.

As usual I do not have the answers, but I can say that I hope living in Indonesia for two years will bring a bit more balance to my life and tame my mindset a bit.

My Head is Out of the Ground - here is the post on Education

So for awhile now I have eluded to the state of the average Indonesia school, but never really talked about it. Knowing that my first post on this grand topic would take some time to write, I have avoided it. However, considering that it is the main reason that I am here, to skirt the topic much longer would leave a gaping hole in your understanding of my work.

I find myself hesitant to write because I want to be careful not to be judgmental about practices here. I recognize that my experiences in the American education system were very extreme, even by America's standards. Education was (and probably still is) third on my list of values only to God and family. I recognized early on in my time in Indonesia that to use my past experiences as the measurement of a "good education system" would not only bring me a lot of stress and frustration, but that it would also not achieve my goals as a volunteer of understanding why things here are the way they are. If (but more realistically "when") I choose to overlook this key factor, it can mean a lot of wasted time, energy, and emotions for  the people involved. And as a logical human being I try to avoid that when possible. I am fairly certain that I have failed at my goal to be nonjudgmental in this post (it is something I am working on), but the account I give here is the reality of my Indonesian school.

I would say that Indonesians have high standards for their system. They want to make sure students obtain an understanding of many subjects by the time they graduate from high school. It isn't uncommon for students to take 18 subjects per semester. This is especially the case for students at madrasahs (Islamic schools), such as the one at which I teach, because Arabic and religious classes are added to the normal curriculum. Students study the general subjects (math, biology, chemistry, history, etc.), but they also study more social subjects like sociology and psychology. Of course those subjects are not unheard of in the average US high school, but they are usually an elective and the average American high school student has about 8 subjects per semester. Where do all the extra subjects come from you ask? Well all the sciences are studied simultaneously. You start to add up those simultaneous subjects and in no time you find students studying 18 subjects at a time. 

Every student studies every subject because they are assigned to a class and do not have individual schedules. This does not allow for flexibility in learning. If a student is smart overall then they are put in the smarter class, even if they are horrible in one or two subjects. This also means that a student must pass or fail overall because there is no opportunity for them to take grade 10 English for a second time.

In order for there to be enough time for all of these subjects, the school week is Mon-Sat, although Fridays are a couple of hours shorter. The schedule is usually set up in a way where subjects are taught in two period blocks. Although many subjects have an average of about four hours a week, some have three and others have five. This means that my classes meet on average twice a week for an hour and a half. With some classes the days are consecutive and with others they are spread a part. Either way the students only have to think about English twice a week. The rest of the time they are welcome to sit back and forget.

Of course with a more sporadic schedule teachers find some days wildly busy (for me Tuesdays and Saturdays) and other days completely empty. This allows teachers to come and go as they please (as long as they are not being paid by the government) and also gives most teachers a second day off in the middle of the week (mine is Friday). I can't pretend that I don't like the leisurely system though. To be honest I think that without it, it would be difficult for women to be teachers here.

For most teachers the time between teaching usually spent socializing with their friends. The school provides workbooks that also contain basic lesson plans. These lesson plans usually consist of "tell the students to do task 3 then go over it." Because most teachers take this approach they find that they have free time in the middle of the day and students usually find English (and if what I am told is correct, all other subjects) difficult. The speed at which most teachers go is usually too fast for students to have adequate time to practice each skill, especially when their classes only meet twice a week.  In the end the students retain hardly anything.

To get by students cheat on homework, quizzes and tests. Indonesian cheating has become so bad and systematic that it even received global attention from NPR and The Economist over the summer. I assume that each student has a strength in at least one subject because of the way the classes are grouped. It seems that by cheating they get themselves (and their classmates) through the rough spots. I have been told that this is because students start to receive pressure from their teachers and the national exam to always be correct. Most students therefore don't realize that there can be more than one answer to a question. If somehow a student still falls behind, in the end there is still a certain amount of pressure from the administration to bump up a student's grade if they are only failing one or two subjects.

In general I find that my students lack critical thinking skills, basic logic, and study skills. When they go to write sentences in English they always write it out in Indonesian first and then use a dictionary to translate. I know that by the time I was in high school I was using the basic words of Chinese and throwing in English when I couldn't remember or didn't know a word. Unfortunately my students have yet to make that transition.

I will say that the students are very energetic. This usually means good things for game based learning, but it is a big a draw back when I am or one of their classmates is speaking. They are all very sweet and although not all may see a purpose for education I would say that the majority do. Their definitions of respect and diligence may not be the same as mine, but I am sure that we will find some common ground.

I think about education a lot here. What goals are realistic? How will my background  mesh with their practices? Which things really need to be worked on and which are ok to let be? How do we find a balance between the American education system that I know and the more laidback one that I work in here? What is the value of education in a society who's local economy is primarily made up of labor intensive jobs? This is what I think about regularly (feel free to give wisdom). These are the questions that don't necessarily need answers but need thought in order for me to work well at my school.

I wrote this today because I in my next post I want to address an article that I one of my PCV friends posted to another. Thanks to Facebook's stalker qualities I read this NYT article today. http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/02/opinion/sunday/meet-the-new-super-people.html?_r=1&src=me&ref=general

Because this post is already long enough and because it was necessary to give a background on Indo schools before commenting on the article, I will leave my thoughts on this it for another day.  

One last thing: Do you all like my blog's new look? I mean I didn't work on it for a full day or anything but I think it turned out pretty darn cute! It's a picture of Indonesian batik fabric. I haven't had it made into a shirt yet, but one day you will see it in a picture on me.

Fee Fi Fo Fum

As I mentioned in a post about volleyball a couple of months ago, my physical build is considerably bigger than the average Indonesian's. Although this applies to weight, it is by no means the only physical attribute which exceeds traditional Indonesian proportions. 

At 5'5" I am taller than probably 90% of Indonesian women and even a large percent of Indonesian men. When I talk to people about volleyball here, they assume that I am a hitter on any team in the US. I had to show them pictures of my teammates for them to believe that I am actually considered short back home, especially by athletic standards.

The size difference that amuses me  the most though is between our feet. Before coming to Indonesia I carefully planned what shoes I would bring. My previous experiences when attempting to shoe shop in the Philippines and China had taught me that my feet are truly American "super-sized." I assumed that Indonesia would be no different. Well I was not mistaken. 

I live in a traditional Indonesian house, which means out front you can find a plethora of sandals. Usually there is a pair for every person in the house, but every now and then we borrow whichever pair of shoes is most convenient. Today my sister, Lutvi, slipped on my sandals as she ran out of the house. I couldn't help but be amused, so I ran in the opposite direction for my camera. 

As you can see her feet kind of swim in them.

Of course this isn't shocking, she is a tiny Indonesian woman after all. What is infinitely more amusing is that when my brother Riza (her husband) put them on, he also swam in them.

This is a guy who is taller than me and considered an average size Indonesian man, yet his feet are tiny compared to mine.

When I tried his sandals on it was no Cinderella story. Instead I was one of the Ugly Step-Sisters.

 

I suppose that I am an even UGLIER step-sister when I try to fit my sister Ira's flip flop. When I saw these shoes at the market I assumed that they were for children, but apparently I was wrong. 

So although I may not be a really be a giant compared to Indonesians I think that it is safe to say that my feet are.

My brother Riza and sister in-law Lutvi on their wedding day.

The Long Gap

So I told myself at the very beginning of this that I would not apologize for my long absences from the blog world, because if I did I would start every entry with one. Even before blogs existed, I was horribly inept at writing on a regular basis. My childhood bookcases were scattered with journals containing only a couple of entries and then nothing but blank pages followed. So here I am officially NOT apologizing for doing nothing more than thinking about the fact that I need to write. I am keeping my promise to myself. 

So I believe the last time I found myself on this website was at the end of July, only a few days before Ramadan began. Well since then I have experienced my first Ramadan, passed both the three month make at site (which means I can take vacation!) and the five month mark in country, had my first get away (even if it was only to Surabaya to eat Italian, Chinese, Dunkin Donuts, Gelato, and Pizza and watch Harry Potter), and finally started teaching for real. So yes a good amount has happened. Well really a lot of nothing happened and then Ramadan finished and life started becoming normal.

It does seem like it would be very stupid not to talk about Ramadan. The fasting month began on August 1rst this year. Ramadan is officially the 9th month of the lunar Islamic calendar. This of course means that it does not follow the Georgian calendar and moves by ten days every year. Next year it will start in July. During this month Muslims do not eat or drink from an hour before sunrise  until sunset. They also abstain from sex and smoking (a real challenge for men in this country). The practice as a whole is to encourage purity. Muslims also tend to go to Mosques for extra prayers in the evening during this month and schools take time out of their schedules to focus on religious education. Many have told me that joining in fasting is the mark of a true Muslim.

 It is also common for more charity work to occur during Ramadan. Here are some pictures from an event that my school hosted. The school's band preformed and the students handed out bags of rice in a poorer area of town.

My host sister Elle.

The school band and village kids rocking out.

 I decided that I would join my family in fasting for the month. I wanted to do it for cultural integration, but more so I wanted to do it for my own spiritual reasons. Everyday started very early indeed. We generally woke up at 3:15 for Sahur, the meal before fasting. We would then fall back into our beds and sleep until we had to wake up for work. The school days were shortened on both ends. We started school an hour later and went home three hours earlier than usual. The periods lasted a grand total of 25 minutes so a lot of learning got done. In the afternoons I came home and generally participated in family naptime. Around 2 in the afternoon all the women  in my house would head back to the kitchen and start preparing buka, which literally translates to open, the meal that broke the days' fast. This was our general schedule for a month.

A neighbor celebrating the last day of fasting.

The month of fasting ended with Idul Fitri or Hari Raya (translated to "the main day"). This was the first day that we were able to eat during the day. Right before this holiday most people travel home to spend it with their families. If married couples live close to one set of in-laws then they tend to go to the other's home for the holiday. This meant that my house was relatively quite because most of my host parent's children live here.

Host sister and her son and neighbor
celebrating the last day of fast.

 

 On Idul Fitri and on the days following families travel around to the houses of friends and family and ask for forgiveness for anything that may have transpired during the previous year.  At each house a whole spread of "kue" (translates to cake, but it is really any sort of desert) is out on the coffee table of each house. It is expected that you eat and drink something at every house.

On the holiday itself my family stayed in the house. My host father is the spiritual leader of the community and therefore a lot of people came to us. Our first round of house hopping was the next day when  we went to visit siblings of my host father.  We went on a second outing after I came home from my trip to Surabaya we did another one of these trips, but this time it was to friends' houses.

To be honest there isn't too much to report on the house hopping practice. Although I understand the meaning behind visiting all the people who are important to you, none of the visits were more than half an hour and most of the time the hosts were spending that time preparing a hot beverage of some kind. This meant that the people that you talked when at each house were the people you arrived with. It just seemed a bit counterintuitive because theoretically we went to these people's houses to spend time with them, but really just spent more time with ourselves. Its kind of like trying to  go to too many Thanksgiving dinners on one day. 

My sister Ira with her nephew (Elle's Song).

My host mother during our Idul Fitri excursions.

So it may not have been a midnight showing,
but I made it there!

So during this holiday I took the opportunity to get away from site for a few days. I met up with a few friends in Surabaya (our base city in East Java) and we spent the weekend in luxury. We ate a lot of really good food, pampered ourselves, watched a movie and just enjoyed being together. I suppose that there really isn't a whole lot to describe. We did things that would just be considered normal in the US. We went out for Italian, Dunkin Donuts, Gelato, Chinese, and Pizza Hut; I suppose the not so normal thing would be that
we did it all in one long weekend.

The sandwich I had craved for five months.

We found a cute tea shop with some delicious tea.

School started again three days after break and I have now been back for two weeks. It seems like it has been longer than that, but then again those two weeks have really flown by. Time is strange here. Minus the initial hic-up on my first day back in the classroom, these two weeks have gone very well. Although I am not really sure that the students are understanding all the material, I am confident that I have made good lesson plans. I know that sounds contradictory, but if you were in my situation you would understand. A majority of the students here have never learned how to learn. To be honest they aren't really expected to, but that is an entry for another time. Suffice it to say teaching here is not black and white, or maybe teaching in general is not black or white. I just know that at the moment I can measure the effort and quality that I have put in and overall I think that the real beginning of this job has gone off as well as can be expected.

Some  Photos from the last two months.

The biggest Kurpuk Container I have ever seen.

Mmmm chocolate chip cookies.

Pizza Making. Totally delicous.

4 Americans adults + 2 Indonesian adults do NOT fit in a dokar (traditional horse drawn carriage.

This was on Indonesian Independence day.
There I am in my all time favorite school uniform (read that with A LOT of sarcasm).

The biggest star fruit I have ever eaten.

Just a note to people for the future. If you want to read more/ want me to write more, then please pester me. I do better when I have a reason to do things for others.

Love you all!

Pass, Toss, Smash

Over the last two weeks I have joined my school's volleyball practices in the afternoons. They meet twice a week to practice and scrimmage. Before arriving the first day I thought that I was heading to an adult pick up game. This was the second time that I was told that there would be volleyball at the school and although no one showed up the first time, I had been told that it was for the teachers. I therefore jumped onto my bike wearing basketball shorts and a t-shirt. I didn't want to be uncomfortable and play in pants, but I also wanted to remain relatively modest.

When I arrived at the school I was surprised to have 60 young faces turn to watch me ride into our courtyard. I was pleased to see that it was about a 60/40 boys to girls, but I was suddenly very aware of my choice in clothing. All of the girls were wearing their olahraga uniforms (gym clothes) which are comprised of a long sleeve shirt and pants. In addition to this they were all wearing jilbabs (head scarves), which is to be expected because I teach at an Islamic school. Needless to say I felt a bit more exposed than I wanted to be in front of my students. Although I often actively choose to wear clothing that is slightly less conservative than what my co-teachers and students wear in public (3/4 length sleeves on my work shirts, but always with pants or a long skirt and t-shirts and capris when going for a bike ride) I do, however, still prefer to make sure that I am not pushing the boundaries too much. On that particular day I did feel that shorts were more than I was comfortable with. Fortunately no one said a word.

I was invited over by the gym teacher and asked to introduce myself to the girls after they had warmed up. As the boys put up the nets the remaining students started doing some passing. The 20-some girls broke up into three passing lines and got moving. I made some observations first before trying to communicate with the girls.

I first did a general assessment of equipment and facilities. For 60 youngsters there are only 5 balls. I had been told that there were 8 on another day, but clearly some were out of commission. At that particular moment the girls were allowed three of these balls and the boys had two. All the balls are severely beaten up because they are indoor balls, but are played with outside on a cement surface. My eyes shifted over to the courts. The nets aren't too bad, but the poles don't have cranks and instead each has a few eye-loops to stick the net strings through. I could see that this was going to make it difficult to get the net to the right height and sure enough it was very low when I walked over. The surface of the boys court isn't too bad. It is fairly smooth, but it is also very dirty which makes it easy to slip and the cement ends only a foot beyond the end line. On the other hand the girl's court is riddled with potholes, rocks, and dirt. Because of the dirty courts the balls get covered in dust, which can be dangerous when setting.

Seeing all the students with only five balls made me laugh. I couldn't help remembering that when I coached club laughed at myself because only 2 months before I would get upset when my JV team would only have 18 balls for 14 girls. As a club coach we had 11 balls, one for each girl. It didn't seem too bad, but I would have preferred more. Now the situation was ludicrice; here the students outnumber the balls 12-1.

I then turned my attention to the girls and in an instant my coach mode kicked in. Although I wanted to correct many of them immediately I made myself observe first. Not wanting to overstep my position, I then talked to the gym teacher about their technique (well tried to anyway, my language skills weren't quite good enough). He stopped them and explained what I couldn't and then they continued. Here and there I tried to demonstrate better ways to do things individually, but overall the communication wasn't great.

After only a few minutes of passing half of the girls got on the court and scrimmaged each other. The skill level wasn't too bad, but it was on par with a high school JV team. Just like most JV teams there were a few girls that knew what they were doing and there were a lot who had some basic levels but no control whatsoever. Even those with natural talent still lacked training that you get from rigorous drills and daily practice. It is clear that these girls learn by playing. Between the lack of balls and number of students attending the practices there isn't much room to do more than just play.

As soon as I made all my observations my mind started racing with solutions. Call up people in the US and get them to donate balls. They are renovating the building right now, any chance that they will resurface the courts after the construction is done? Maybe we can split the girls up and have them come on two separate days for drill practices and technique work and then on a third day they can all come to scrimmage. Even with only five balls it my be doable.

Since this initially stream of ideas I have calmed down a bit. I had to remind myself that this isn't the US and these kids are just playing for fun. Well I do hope that all kids, whether Indonesian or American, play for fun (and also to get better), but there is no need to turn it into an American volleyball program. Although they do play teams from other schools it still not the same. The fact that these girls show up and enjoy the time that they are here is good. If I can help them even further then I will be more than happy to.

Eventually I was asked to join in and so I did.

Although the initial emotions of being back in a coaching setting was comforting, it didn't stick around long. The funny thing about an inability to communicate is that it can make even the activities that you enjoy most incredibly difficult. This is especially true when those activities involve a team where communication is critical. The funny thing about doing activities that you enjoy a lot in another country for the first time is that it shows you where your language is week. Between both experiences I realized that I need to study up on volleyball terminology so that I can simply play with them and hopefully in the long run coach them.

My games with the girls were more than a bit confusing. I know that when playing level is lower coaches tend to simplify the rotation and sometimes break the rules. It would not have been difficult to make the adjustments if I could just have figured out how they were doing it. It was obvious that they had modified their play, but I couldn't figure out how to ask them where I was in the rotation or where they are used to having their setter move from. Maybe they wouldn't have know, but it still would have been nice to ask.

At the end of my first afternoon I got to play with the big boys, literally. It was teachers (plus three students) verses boys. I enjoyed it. Because of communication I screwed up a few times, but I also managed a few good plays here and their.

All in all it has been good to be back around volleyball despite the frustrations. It was only sebentaran (for a moment) though. Tomorrow marks the start of Ramadhan which means that all extracurricular activates will stop. That topic, however, is for another day.

"KIRI (2 - 3 - 4), KIRI (2 - 3 - 4)" (written Sat. 7/23)

"KIRI (2 - 3 - 4), KIRI (2 - 3 - 4)"
is what will hear from the hours of 7-10am in the streets of East Java (and honestly probably the greater part of Indonesia) for the next few weeks. The students are preparing for "Freedom Day" on August 17, which is their equivalent of the 4th of July. This call is accompanied by the very structured military walking (almost marching) of groups of students. Each class is broken into two groups, girls and boys, and they form three straight lines, with a caller/ leader on the left.

At least two times this week the students have taken to the streets to practice their military marching. On both occasions my classes were canceled. This wasn't made known to me until an hour before my class on the first day (after I had stayed up an extra hour the night before to finish my lesson plans). I was forewarned of today's marching practice yesterday, so although I my plans have already been made, I knew that I wouldn't need to mentally prepare myself for the classroom today. I was also told today that the students will be walking Mon.-Thurs. next week as well.

Although they are currently practicing them for Freedom Day, schools also use military type organization and marching at all age levels for schools ceremonies. These are not as uncommon as the rare school assembly in the US. At most Indonesian schools there is a weekly flag ceremony on Monday mornings. I am fortunate to go to a school that does not uphold this practice, but I did experience them in my practicum school. To get organized there is usually a lot of yelling into the microphone military style "HU" type stuff. During these ceremonies students stand in the same formation they take for their current marching practices and there is a whole litany of check ins with students and administrators of various rankings. After some speeches and a recitation of 5 expectations of Indonesian students, the flag is brought to the pole (with military marching again) and then raised while the national anthem plays. These ceremonies usually last 1 jam (period), which is about 45 min.

There are a few things that I can never help thinking about when it comes to these military marching and ceremony practices. The schools spend so much time getting this right. They have started preparing for Aug. 17 a month in advance. When the students accidentally started to raise the flag upside-down at my practicum school the teachers got fidgety and upset as the students worked to correct it. These reactions contradict the reactions to student's behavior in class and these preparations for one day contradict the minimal preparations that went into the start of a new school year. With this in mind I have come to the conclusion that executing these practices is a source of pride for Indonesians.

I often wonder if this is how they choose to instill structure and discipline in their students. If this is the case I don't see it carry over into the classrooms. Often times students are quite rowdy in the class, but this is a topic for another day. Lets just say that the structure you see in these drills does not match the structure found in the classrooms or even the attitudes of the administration, faculty and students of the schools. Obviously there is simply a different values system here.

Although I have yet to experienced my first Freedom Day in Indonesia I can already tell that it will be more than a little different than from our 4th of July. It looks as if students will spend the day marching around our little city with their schools. This is therefore not a holiday for picnicking and watching fireworks at night. Oh yeah . . . and its during Ramadan, so there really won't be picnicking unless it is before 4am or after 6pm. It will definitely be an interesting experience to say the least.

Food Culture

I have almost become a vegetarian here in Indonesia. Well ok not really, but a good portion of my meals are vegetarian. I still eat meat about once every two days or so, but that is in contrast to eating meat for at least two meals a day back in the US. Not to mention every meal here is like dinner in the US, so if the situation were the same in the US then I would be eating meat for every meal.

The culture of food here is quite a bit different. Almost everyone in the house wakes up around 4:30 to pray, but if you do happen to live in a house that doesn't wake up to pray, then the women still wake up just as early to cook. A majority of the food is cooked in the morning and then left on the table so that you can come in to get food whenever you feel hungry later in the day. Indonesians stick to three meals a day just as we do, but the food is almost always the same for the entire day.

Here at permanent site my meals are almost the same everyday. There is, of course, an abundance of . . . Rice! I am in Asia and a 3rd world country after all. Every morning (and afternoon and evening as well) I can also find a pot of boiled vegetables with its stock, a plate of fried tempe (a compact block of soy beans) and tofu, and a plate of fried fish. Sometimes there is also a plate of chicken, but its not a staple. Depending on how fast all this food is eaten side dishes also become supplemented throughout the day with other food that has been purchased or cooked later. Sometimes at night my bapak goes out and buys sate (a grilled chicken skewer covered with a peanut sauce).

An interesting question that comes up when Indonesians ask about food in the US is "what is your base food?" They assume that it is bread, but we all of course know that it is not. We don't eat bread three times a day. I have told them that you may find it as toast for breakfast (but not always) and you will usually find in in a sandwich for lunch, but you don't normally see it on your dinner plate. During the first week of both of my homestays my family has bought me bread with the assumption that it would make me feel more at home. To their surprise I told them that I would rather eat rice for breakfast. I told them that I usually do not eat bread for a meal on its own. In some ways they were relieved by this because they don't see how you can be full off of bread (I have explained that I usually eat it with meat), but in other ways this confused them just as much. If bread is not our "base food" then what is?

We all know that we don't eat the same thing everyday, let alone for every meal. This is clearly a cultural difference. Maybe it is simply because we can afford variety or maybe it is because here food is what you simply need to stay alive. Either way it is different. I don't dislike the way I eat here. I think it actually makes it easier to control my intake of food (something that I have been struggling with for my entire life). It is kind of like wearing a uniform. If all the options are taken away then you don't have to worry about what you are going to wear and getting ready for work is a bit easier. I no longer think about what food would please me most at this particular moment and go searching for it. It also makes the days when I can choose food more fun. Its like dressing up a bit and allowing your desire to get a choice every now and then. All in all I think that this way of eating is working for me because there is balance.

Another difference is that meals are usually not a communal affair here. I eat most meals alone or at most with one other person. I don't know for sure why this is the case though. Some possible reasons may be that there usually isn't enough room around the table of everyone or because food may be seen as more of a necessity rather than a daily pleasure. (They certainly do find food to be a source of pleasure, but that doesn't mean that you indulge your cravings at every meal.) Overall though, I feel that Indonesians do not need family time over meals. Unlike suburban Americans, Indonesian villagers get plenty of family time throughout the day because the school and work day usually ends around 2pm. Their schedules revolve much more around the home. It is therefore not a necessity for them to take something practical like eating and turn it into family time.

Food here (and its culture) is good. I both equally enjoy it and get what I need. Balance has never come easily to me in regards to food. Hopefully I will be able to stick with the habits I have developed in the last few weeks as my time here progresses and even once I return to America.